Expect A Miracle...

This week has been one of utter exhaustion, much of it emotional for ALL of us. Last week Tuesday, Brad's brother Kevin came home from Texas and his wife Kelle and Darby flew in late Friday night (yep, that's them in the pic!). It has been years since we've seen Kelle and Darby and it was really great seeing all the kids play together. The only bummer is that Brad's oldest brother Todd, wasn't home with his wife and kids so that the family was complete. Todd will be coming home soon which will be wonderful, but unfortunately, it may still be a little while before we see the rest of his family.

On Saturday night, Mom and Dad ordered pizza and had all the family as well as our dear friends Chad and Cathy over. Unfortunately, Cathy was really sick and couldn't join us, but we were able to enjoy Chad hanging out with all of us. Chad and Cathy are literally like members of the family - Chad and Kevin grew up hanging out together and over the years, Chad and Brad have become friends. It's really pretty amazing to connect to such grounded and sincere individuals like them.

The emotions really started (for me) on Saturday when Kelle was holding something in her hand and called me into the laundry room. With tears in her eyes, she held up a little gray pouch and said that she had something for me. While she was explaining that it wasn't much, it was something that meant a great deal to her and had been given to her by a friend when she and Kevin were struggling with job transitions. Out of the pouch, Kelle removed a silver heart, about the size of a fifty cent piece that on one side says: "Expect A Miracle" and on the other side has a cross. By the time Kelle showed it to me, we were both sobbing uncontrollably and just stood in the laundry room hugging. Kelle instructed me that I was to keep it for as long as I needed and then when the time was right, pass it on to somebody who I felt needed it in their life. Kelle, I know I didn't express this the best in the laundry room, nor did I probably share it with you before you all left, but this was the MOST beautiful gift I could have ever asked for. I have carried it with me everywhere I go and it means more than you know - thank you.

On Sunday, we returned to North Roanoke Baptist for our first "Sunday School Class". Pastor Darryl is conducting a 4-week class for those that may be interested in joining the church in the future. During Sunday School, Pastor Darryl shared his personal story about coming to know Jesus and the struggles and challenges that he often felt along the way. For some reason, it was like he was speaking DIRECTLY to me. Yep, you guessed it, I cried for almost the entire hour in front of the whole group (if I recall correctly there were 9 of us there). After church was over, Brad and I asked him to pray with us. Pastor Darryl's prayer was so powerful and immediately connected to both of our hearts while once again turning on my never-ending eye faucets. I must admit, even Brad said he felt like he was on the verge of crying - that is such a shocker!

This morning, Brad woke up with this really strange rash all over his head and when he got out of the shower, he was full of polka dots - it was kinda scary. Not knowing what was going on, I sent Dr. Fintel an e-mail message to which he immediately responded saying he wanted Brad at his office at 8am. When we got there, Dr. Fintel calmed us immediately by telling us he wasn't concerned about Brad's rash (after he saw it), but had been concerned when he received my message because it's quite common for Lymphoma patients to develop shingles. Brad just has a simple case of "folliculitus" (you all know what that is - just a rash that occurs near a hair line of course). Luckily, after getting a prescription for a bacterial antibiotic that Brad won't get filled, we were on our way out the door and off to work. That too, just set the stage for more emotions for both of us throughout the day.

I'm not quite sure how to explain everything that we're feeling. One minute we're fine and the next minute feeling like we're being stuffed into a box and cannot breathe because of all the unknowns. It's a hard thing to explain to others, but we're hoping the feeling goes away when we start getting more answers and treatment begins.

We head off to Duke on Monday for the day - I'm sure it will be a day with many emotions and fears, but a day that strangely enough, we look forward to. I'm not sure that we'll have anything to write before then, but thank you for keeping us all in your thoughts!

Love to you all,

Sandy

p.s. We ask that you keep sweet little Avery in your hearts and prayers as he is challenged in many ways right now dealing with all of these adult issues. It's hard for him to understand everything and he expressed tonight his fear that his Dad won't ever get better. It's a fear we all have, but of course don't mention. We love you Avery and will continue to do everything we can to help you cope with all of this.